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Tambayan ng mga Chicx at Tsonx => General Discussion => Love & Relationship => Topic started by: Ozymandias on September 28, 2014, 10:07:00 PM
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It's long by the way so I used spoiler tag.
[spoiler]So I'm dating this pretty korean girl (she used to be my client), na sa simula akala ko one night stand lang kami then after that back to casual ways. Pero we found ourselves wanting to see each other more often and do what a couple usually does. She knows i'm in a relationship na more than half a decade and she doesn't mind as long as we can see each other and mag s-e-x but noted to her na n.s.a. (no strings attached) kami kasi may gf ako and she agreed. However pinakilala na nya ako sa mga other friends nya na mga koreans din na yung iba marunong na magtagalog (talk about N.S.A.) but honestly I'm enjoying my time with them kasi iba yung humor nila, iba yung pag tanggap nila sa akin BUT they don't know that I have a gf. All that they know is that I'm dating their baby doll, yes they call her their baby doll. Sya yung pinaka alaga sa kanila ever since her bf broke up with her at sobrang na depress after that. Since she is really pretty madaming nanghi-hit sa kanya kaya they all act as their body guard kasi minsan may mga rude Filipino guys, kaya they were surprised that she's dating me, ironically a Filipino guy, but they're thankful that I'm nice to her and she's happy with me. If only they know... *DEEP SIGH*
One night, after a drinking session sa condo nila, she confessed na sana single na lang ako at 100% na sya lang talaga yung babae sa buhay ko. We had a long talk about it as she gave me a hint na she's falling in love with me faster than she would have anticipated, dahil akala nya okay na sya na may s-e-x life sya pero unti unti syang nade-develop sa kin. Kinakantahan ko nga sya ng "Bakit ngayon ka lang?" as a joke kahit half of those words di nya maintindihan or gets pa but it is coming true now kasi I felt the same way to her and she feels it as well. We even watched the Gilas vs Korea yesterday and It's more fun kasi lahat sila dun kampi sa Korea, ako lang sa gilas at inaasar ko sila nung tambak ang Korea, but in the end talo Gilas so lahat sila inasar ako at may libreng batok sila sa akin as a loser but in a fun way syempre. I can't describe how happy I am hanging out with her friends, especially with her. As usual I have to lie to my gf kung saan ako galing at lahat na ng alibis ay naibigay ko na. I can't actually share this to my buddies kasi they've built a good relationship with my gf. Yes I'm a cheater ever since and this is the 3rd time that I did it.
Minsan naisip ko kung ano meron sa akin na wala dun sa ibang nangliligaw sa kanya na mga kalahi pa nya until now. I still haven't asked her about it. I've seen her x-bf though and di naman kami magkamukha or any resemblance at all.
To make everything even more complicated, the other girl(#2) that I used to slept with ay biglang nagparamdam telling me na she wanna hook up, single na, ako na lang daw hindi. It's another story but that girl(#2), she used to be my cheating partner, yes a cheating partner, she has a bf, I have a gf so kung baga patas lang. She is that kind of girl na mestiza beauty at obvious na rich girl because of the way she speaks na natural and for regular guys like me na dati hanggang friends lang kasi iisipin mo na she's out of your league kasi nakakatorpe yung ganda nya. I met her back in some festival during summer through a mutual friend during that event and at that same night we hook-up because we were both tipsy. The next day I apologized sa nangyari and I immediately confessed na may gf ako, surprisingly sya din ay may bf pero wala lang sa Pinas at nagbabakasyon sa L.A.
Then a few days later, we bumped into each other into the same restaurant during dinner time with our families, from there pinakilala nya ako sa dad nya na intimidating but a very decent man and pinakilala ko rin sya sa family ko. We became close at napadalas mag usap sa FB at through text messages na naging s-e-xting kasi we were both feeling naughty. Then unexpectedly she had a crazy idea at niyaya nya ko to sleep over sa house nya since mga maids na lang kasama nya for several days. So obviously I agreed to her kasi you don't usually get a chance like that one and the idea na we're doing a marathon s-ex which excites me. We only stop communicating every time nasa Pinas ang bf nya na i.m.h.o. di hamak na mas gwapo sa kin dahil Half Pinoy-Half Kano hahaha. Kidding aside, she did some favor to me kaya I can't simply cut my communication sa kanya because I would like to give back the favor to her without losing anything supposedly. I'm not sure if she just want to do the deed again or maging kami? When I answered her call, she's being sweet and all but medyo awkward ngayon since hati na ako dun sa dalawa.
Finally my gf, the only girl that I loved na ilang taon na lang, 1 decade na kami. She has a baby and pretty face na unang mapapansin mo sa kanya, at sa dami ng nanligaw sa kanya during college ako yung lucky guy na sinagot nya. My family addresses her as their daughter-in-law and sister-in-law dahil sa tagal na namin. Ever since I confessed when I first cheated, nag iba yung relationship namin at mas naging mature sya towards a lot of things at sobrang sensitive sya sa issues about cheating, because of what I did in the past (and until now but she has no idea). She is very busy sa work and I'm here screwing around.
Fvck haha this is a confession na dito ko lang pwede ishare sa PT forum and I know madami dito ang open-minded sa mga ganitong situation/issues. I can't even imagine letting go one of them because of the circumstances. Sigh, I screwed up big time. I am expecting some members here to bash at me since I am a cheater and I feel really bad about it. Even celebrities are more prone to cheating, paano pa kaya ang regular guy like me?
So what would you, [you] do in my position?
:(
P.S.
Thank you @lovemarie ikaw lang nakakausap ko about this, but it's about time
[/spoiler]
TL;DR
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I did not read the whole story cause its long,but base on the title itself i concluded my reply..what would i do if im in your shoe? I guess i will ask myself is it LOVE or LUST? Do i respect the opposite six or im just thinking only for myself? Do i know the meaning of the word Responsibility,Honesty and most specially Fear of GOD? ask yourself???..hopes this help..
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Nothing is illegal, until you get caught..
Para saken, okay lang makipag six sa ibang girl as long as kaya mo i handle yung feelings mo. Yan ang literal na no strings attached. Pero kung nahulog ka na talaga sa fubu mo, yan palang ang matatawag na cheating. Hehehe.
Just my 2 cents..
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aba... isa ba to sa mga pogi problem ni sir ozy hehehe..
will get back to you soonest... :bye:
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If I will put myself in your shoes, syempre yan na ang pinakamasarap na nararamdaman ng isang lalake dahil nasa iyo na lahat ng pleasure/companion/etc sa ibat ibang babae and without losing your someone so dearly to you. Nasa euphoria kapa ng ganitong sitwasyon at alam naman natin na hindi to permanente. Naamaze ka pa sitwasyon mo pero at some chunk of your mind, nandyan na napapaisip ka na rin dahil nagpost ka ng ganito dito pero dahil sa sarap ng posisyon mo ngayon may nacrecreate na argument para to justify yun ginagawa mo. Like this one on your post
"Even celebrities are more prone to cheating " though hindi naman conclusive to say this one dahil ang cheating is a human instinct in nature. So regardless sa status mo sa buhay.
Nanyari na sa akin na mapunta sa posisyon mo. Other words cheater din ako. Well, human in nature are cheaters. Depende lang naman sa tao kung papaano nila kokontrolin yun urge nila to cheat. I had some sort of fling to six relationship with someone during my college days. Sa una syempre WOW... Nanyayare ba sa akin to at hindi rin makapaniwala. Biruin mo naman, meron sayo nagbibigay ng extra care and pleasure sayo. Nasa sa akin na lahat kumbaga at that time. Pero dumating sa point unti unti na nawawala yun original partner ko at that time. Unti unti na rin na hindi ko na rin nakikilala uli ang sarili ko and ways ko for her. Kumbaga nagiba ako ng timpla sa kanya as mas pinapaboran ko yun isang partner ko over her dahil nga nasa kanya yun sinasabi ng ilan yun thrill. Hanggan sa nag alaman na at yun unti unti nasisira yun mga nanyayare bagay sa akin na para bang nagising ka sa panaginip. Yun mga bagay na nandyan sayo unti unti na nawawala kumbaga. Then dito ko lang narealize yun mga bagay na dapat paghalagan. Yun mga bagay na dapat na ingatan. Everything na nanyayare na sarap nuon eh yun rin pala ang sisira sa buhay mo. Hindi lang natin alam kung ano sinisira neto, bibiglain ka na lang at one point of our lives na sira na pala. And worst wala ka ng way to repair the damages that has been done.
Sa ngayon hindi kapa aware na may nasisira na? Kung magpapatuloy pa yan baka wala ka na magawang remedyo. Do these girls of yours deserved to be toyed by someone like you? Lalo na yun original partner mo. Sa ngayon hindi pa tayo nadadala at the first instance na nahuli ka nya siguro dahil alam mong mahal ka masyado ng gf mo o hindi naman ganun strong ang feelings mo for her. Well wala na ako dyan.
Ang sa akin lang naman, may pagkakataon ka pa to patch these these things up. Alam naman natin kung ano ang dapat gawin, clouded lang tayo sa ngayon dahil sa euphoria ng sitwasyon natin. Its no brainer ika nga kung sino ang dapat pahalagahan natin sa buhay. Just think lang naman kung sino ba gusto natin makasama? Magiging masaya ba tayo sa tao na pipiliin natin and knowing na wala na yun iba sa buhay mo? Makakaya ba natin mabuhay na wala ang isa sa buhay natin at kasama yun pinili natin? We cannot have it all sa buhay. Only one deserves to be our one.
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Awts babalikan ko ito bunso promise ..... Just take it easy okey as i told you take care...
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Thank you sir fayt for your insight. You're right that i can still patch this up and should make up my mind. For now kailangan ko talaga pag isipan muna ito lahat, it's sad kasi di maiiwasan na may masaktan because of my(our) selfishness.
Recently sya palagi kasama at kausap ko, as if we're officially a couple. Everytime na napagkakamalan kami in public iba yung ngiti at saya nya talaga. Same with my gf na sobrang saya nya and she makes sure na sulit yung araw na magkasama kami. Makes it even harder.
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Abangan ko yan doc.
For those pretty venuses na nakausap ko via private wc, thank you sa mga advice. Namulat ako sa mga nasabi nyo dahil iba talaga if it came from a woman's perspective.
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Just finished reading the story. I didn't experience cheating to a partner kaya wala akong idea, honestly. But putting myself in your situation, it seems like you're trying to get some hard stuff to smash on your own head. You are aware that you are in a relationship with a girl that has no idea of your wrongdoings. I may agree with fayt about cheating is a nature of man, but that still depends on how a man handle it. Of course we are up for the pleasure of having other company aside from our own partner. You've found something that's missing with your current girl, that's a possible factor (being with a sixy/pretty woman is a man's pride). While you're enjoying it, you won't notice that you are being unfair with your original partner. You are just making a complicated situation. Make sure you know how to get out of that situation since you've started it. I haven't cheated before as I respect the woman. But I know the feeling of enjoyment. I only flirt when I'm single. Mas masaya maging ganyan kung alam mong wala kang nasasagasaang tao. Malinis pa ang konsensya mo. Being in a relationship is a responsibility. Be man enough to face it. The problem here is you're attached to the other girl already. Fighting your own feeling is a difficult part, but at the end you will still choose. Know who to keep and who to let go. One day you’ll realize you lost a diamond while too busy collecting stones. Think about it. You can't have both of them. Be selfish only if you're single, but you chose to be in a relationship so don't act like a kid anymore. Let your mind take control of the situation. Ang "puso" pang Gilas lang, sa relasyon kailangan ng "utak" bago ang "puso". Parang babala sa public places, "Please be mindful of your personal belongings." Baka mawala pa kung sino ang talagang mahalaga sa yo. Don't let regrets win at the end. I'll leave those words for you to think about.
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...You've found something that's missing with your current girl, that's a possible factor (being with a sixy/pretty woman is a man's pride).
... Being in a relationship is a responsibility. Be man enough to face it. The problem here is you're attached to the other girl already. Fighting your own feeling is a difficult part, but at the end you will still choose. Know who to keep and who to let go. One day you’ll realize you lost a diamond while too busy collecting stones. Think about it. You can't have both of them. Be selfish only if you're single, but you chose to be in a relationship so don't act like a kid anymore. Let your mind take control of the situation. Ang "puso" pang Gilas lang, sa relasyon kailangan ng "utak" bago ang "puso". Parang babala sa public places, "Please be mindful of your personal belongings." Baka mawala pa kung sino ang talagang mahalaga sa yo. Don't let regrets win at the end. I'll leave those words for you to think about.
Well said tol Arthas, it's true (and what a shame) that I lost my sense of responsibility while being committed in a relationship. I'm actually speechless right now from your comment that i feel like I'm talking to one of my closest friends and I really appreciate it. Both you and @Schy taught me to use my brain/head this time to make up my mind. It might take some time since it won't be easy to let go either one of them.
I just don't know when will I do it.
Reality: I couldn't resist meeting up and being with her most of the time. We're actually inseparable when we're together that I started to feel that we need each other now while I'm forgetting that i'm in a committed relationship. Too much puso that I'm being unfair to my real partner.
Thank you tol!
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Well said tol Arthas, it's true (and what a shame) that I lost my sense of responsibility while being committed in a relationship. I'm actually speechless right now from your comment that i feel like I'm talking to one of my closest friends and I really appreciate it. Both you and @Schy taught me to use my brain/head this time to make up my mind. It might take some time since it won't be easy to let go either one of them.
I just don't know when will I do it.
Reality: I couldn't resist meeting up and being with her most of the time. We're actually inseparable when we're together that I started to feel that we need each other now while I'm forgetting that i'm in a committed relationship. Too much puso that I'm being unfair to my real partner.
Thank you tol!
Take your time brader. You need not to hurry up. The situation is a bit complicated now since you're already attached to her. People may give different advise but at the end of the day, it's you who will decide what to do.
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Hi bunso
Quote ko lang itong sinabi ni arthas ha "one day you'll realize you lost a diamond while too busy collecting stones"
May tama siya dito may kasabihan kasi tau minsan nasa huli ang pagsisi... Lahat ata bunso nasabi na nila sau but at the end ikaw pa rin mgpapasys kong saan ka liligaya kahit ano pa advice or sinabi namin kong dika naman masaya at walang peace of mind... Kaya masasabi ko bunso kong saan ka masaya at liligaya you have to think a hundred times'cause life is too short .....
Utak at puso mgkasama yan sa pag pasya mo... Wise decision bunso okey?!
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Hi bunso
Quote ko lang itong sinabi ni arthas ha "one day you'll realize you lost a diamond while too busy collecting stones"
May tama siya dito may kasabihan kasi tau minsan nasa huli ang pagsisi... Lahat ata bunso nasabi na nila sau but at the end ikaw pa rin mgpapasys kong saan ka liligaya kahit ano pa advice or sinabi namin kong dika naman masaya at walang peace of mind... Kaya masasabi ko bunso kong saan ka masaya at liligaya you have to think a hundred times'cause life is too short .....
Utak at puso mgkasama yan sa pag pasya mo... Wise decision bunso okey?!
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Wise decision this time talaga. Things escalated quickly kaya nauwi sa ganitong situation. Thank you doc (:
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Hi Ozy,
I don't know the whole story,i mean the details.but then again,minsan pag magdedesisyon tyo,hindi madali kc we have to weigh things talaga.at minsan,hindi rin ntin maiwasan ang may masaktan s mga desisyon ntin to the point n pati tayo nasasaktan din.quote ko lng ung nabasa ko,if you love two person,chooce the second for you won't love another if u truly love the first.BUT,case to case basis p rin.whatever ur decision will be,minsan ndi ntin pede pairalin ang puro puso,kailangan din ntin gamitan ng utak.nevertheless,kung ano man ang decision mo ngaun keep in mind that it will greatly affect ur future. :)
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I dunno you and I'm not your friend but somebody needs to slap you - with a hammer - in the jugular. You need to end this fuc-k fest right now.
And since you're going straight, I need the Korean girl's number.
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I dunno you and I'm not your friend but somebody needs to slap you - with a hammer - in the jugular. You need to end this fuc-k fest right now.
And since you're going straight, I need the Korean girl's number.
Nice one sir caligula... About getting the Korean girl's number...
Sir Ozymandias...
I almost had that same situation na meron ka...
So I have a general idea na masakit nga sa ulo yan...
Generally speaking, we are talking about 3 girls...
Tama sina sir fayt na piliin mo kung sino ang gusto mong makasama...
Yung tipong magiging masaya ka pa din kahit mawala yung dalawa...
Mas maganda siguro kung isa isa mong iweigh ang importance nila sa buhay mo...
Kaya sinasabi kong isa isahin mong pakawalan para at the end isa lang ang matira sa iyo...
In the end kasi, isa lang ang puede mong itira...
Yung babaeng nakikita mong magiging partner mo in life...
:-\ :-\ :-\
Unless, you can reconcile the situation parang sa situation ni sir dakilang mangangalakal...
:peace: :peace: :peace:
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Hi Ozy,
I don't know the whole story,i mean the details.but then again,minsan pag magdedesisyon tyo,hindi madali kc we have to weigh things talaga.at minsan,hindi rin ntin maiwasan ang may masaktan s mga desisyon ntin to the point n pati tayo nasasaktan din.quote ko lng ung nabasa ko,if you love two person,chooce the second for you won't love another if u truly love the first.BUT,case to case basis p rin.whatever ur decision will be,minsan ndi ntin pede pairalin ang puro puso,kailangan din ntin gamitan ng utak.nevertheless,kung ano man ang decision mo ngaun keep in mind that it will greatly affect ur future. :)
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Thank you for the advice ms. Raven. Yes, case to case basis pa rin for this for now steady lang muna kami but we're ready for whatever happens.
I dunno you and I'm not your friend but somebody needs to slap you - with a hammer - in the jugular. You need to end this fuc-k fest right now.
And since you're going straight, I need the Korean girl's number.
I'm okay with the slap with a hammer but can't touch my korean girl! Haha
;D
Nice one sir caligula... About getting the Korean girl's number...
Sir Ozymandias...
I almost had that same situation na meron ka...
So I have a general idea na masakit nga sa ulo yan...
Generally speaking, we are talking about 3 girls...
Tama sina sir fayt na piliin mo kung sino ang gusto mong makasama...
Yung tipong magiging masaya ka pa din kahit mawala yung dalawa...
Mas maganda siguro kung isa isa mong iweigh ang importance nila sa buhay mo...
Kaya sinasabi kong isa isahin mong pakawalan para at the end isa lang ang matira sa iyo...
In the end kasi, isa lang ang puede mong itira...
Yung babaeng nakikita mong magiging partner mo in life...
:-\ :-\ :-\
Unless, you can reconcile the situation parang sa situation ni sir dakilang mangangalakal...
:peace: :peace: :peace:
Hello sir Iceprince,
I don't know the situation of sir dakilang mangangalakal, and would you care to share your situation before? Maybe I can learn a thing or two from you. Sa ngayon my korean girl is okay with this kind of set up as long as we continue our physical intimacy and we both avoid talking what we feel about each other. While the 3rd girl who also wants the same set up all over again, well I don't know about that. I have no plans of telling her (gf) about this for obvious reason so no reconcile.