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Tambayan ng mga Chicx at Tsonx => General Discussion => Love & Relationship => Topic started by: arkmeje on October 20, 2013, 12:24:42 AM
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Greetings guys!
Just want to know your opinion about my situation right now.
Here it goes... Im in a relationship for 5 years and all I can say it was good. Kilala na ako sa family nya and same goes for her to my family. Naging kami pero parang laro lang, pareho kami broken hearted that time, tapos nagpakiramdaman kung sino unang bibigay hanggang sa nagkaseryosohan.
For the longest time in our relationship di ko pa nafeel like what I felt before. Yung kilig kapag magkasama kami or pag naririnig mo lng ang boses nya. Pero I always try to move away pero di ko magawa. I always ended up with her. And also we are totally opposite on almost everything but still manage to enjoy each others company.
Here is the hard part, I met this girl she join our group(during my school days dance troupe). At first di ko sya maxado pinapansin pero by the time na nagkausap na kmi parang naatract na ako sa kanya. She is intelligent and pareho kami ng gusto. She knows that I have a gf they know each other. I know and she knows that there is something between us. Pero di namin pinaguusapan. Alam kasi namin na mali. Hanggang sa lumipas ang ilang buwan nag focus na lang ako sa career ko and kinalimutan ko sya basta balita ko nun may bf n sya. Until reccently nabalitaan ko na break na cla ng bf nya. But for me Im still in a relationship. Di ko alam pero bakit gusto ko talagang ligawan sya pero di pwede kasi may gf na ako. Di ko alam bakit ganun na lang talaga feelings ko sa kanya. Nang hihinayang naman ako sa pinagsamahan namin ng gf ko ngaun. Just need your opinion guys.
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ang hirap naman ng ganyan. pero ang advice ko lang is wag na wag mo silang pagsasabayin. kung gusto mong pormahan itong si bagong girl, at least break up with your gf first. that's the least you could do for her kung hindi ka ganun ka-saya sa relationshop nyo. she deserves someone who loves her as much as she loves you.
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Baka nababato ka na sa current relationship mo.
Baka excitement/infatuation lang yung nararamdaman mo para dun sa bagong girl.
Kung nanghihinayang ka lang dun sa current relationship/gf mo, pakawalan mo na sya and break up with her tapos pursue this new girl. Pero kapag ginawa mo yan, wag mo nang balikan yung magiging ex mo kapag hindi nagwork out yung gagawin mong pagporma dun sa new girl.
Masasaktan yung current gf mo, natural yun pero mas masakit kung pagsasabayin mo sila.
You need to let go of one girl and pursue the other. Ulitin ko, let go muna and then pursue, hindi pwedeng may gf ka pa pero nililigawan mo na itong bago. Unggoy lang ang gumagawa ng ganun, yung humahanap muna ng bagong kakapitan bago bibitawan yung naunang sanga na sinabitan nya.
Dapat sana hindi na nagsimula yung landian nyong dalawa, ayan tuloy nahulog ka sa tukso.
Isa lang sa kanila ang pwede mong mahalin. Pumili ka tapos pakawalan mo ng tuluyan yung isa. Sana yung pipiliin mo ay yung mamahalin mo ng todo, yung wala ka nang makikitang dahilan pa para ipagpalit sa isang bagong babae na pwede mong maging ka-close ulit in the future.
Good luck.
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Ang relationship daw is parang restaurant.... you order something you like and then you see someone's order and thought it was better than what you have and thought you like it but can't really change your order kasi it was already in front of you.....
This is one challenge in a relationship, when you have someone in your life you always feel too secure you have her without realizing how important she's to you. You will only know this when the time comes that your path separated in the middle, take it from me, i've been in this path once and doesn't want to go through that again...i've learned my lesson.
If you can change your mind regarding your gf because of her and she can change her mind regarding her bf because of you so what is holding you to be sure you or her doing the same thing again kapag nakakita ulit kayo ng isang tao na feeling niyo is better??
You have a 5 year relationship but you said you didn't feel the same as the new girl did...how come? Did you forgot the excitement or yung gf mo ang nanligaw sa iyo noon? You have to weigh it my friend, things are not always the way you look at it. Baka magsisisi ka if you decided to pursue the new one. I have a gf similar to your situation right now. The only difference is, siya ang nagdalawang isip sa akin after a 4 year relationship... and turns out her decision was wrong... kasi when she left me or i'm force to leave her, the guy doesn't have the balls to back his word. Hindi nagtagal ang relasyon nila at sa iba siya napakasal at yung napangasawa niya doesn't really know the word family. Hiwalay na sila ngayon leaving her with two children to take care of by herself....nagsisisi siya but can't really do anything to face the challenge. She tried to come back to me after the unsuccessful relationship noon bago siya napakasal sa iba but i dismiss it kasi i don't really trust her anymore....and it might happen to you if you broke the trust your gf is giving you.....so better prepare yourself if you decided the new one is better....good luck...
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Thank you all for your advice! I really appreciate it. Although I am still confused right now.
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Who do you think would make you happier?
Imagine yourself, 20 years from now with your gf, and do it also with the other girl. How does it pan out in your mind?
I wouldn't say wag mo pagsabayin, I think I lost the right the say it, pero it's the right thing to do.
You can also screw yourself up if you just got some mixed messages from the girl and she didn't like you pala in that way, and you professed to her only to end up with both hating you cause their friends (they are right?) that would suck badly, wouldn't it?
Anyway don't over complicate things. Baka lust lang yan. Sayang naman.
There is no such thing as the one. Sa movies lang yan. The most important person in the world is that one person who agreed to spend the rest of their lives with you.
The grass will always be greener on the other side, there will always be someone younger, someone smarter, someone better, pero If okay GF mo then stick with her. Love your own. That's the secret to being happy in a relationship.
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Wag ka manghinayang. Plain and simple.
Manghinayang ka kung papakawalan mo ang babaeng palagay mo gusto mo talaga.
Break up in a sincere fashion. Ipaliwanag mo sa kanya ng mabuti. Then follow your heart. :)
Good luck!
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have the finality of your feeling...
try to think of it...
mabubuhay ka ba ng masaya kung wala na yun current gf mo.... Kaya ba ng sistema mo na hindi mo kasama ang current gf mo.. imagining mo ang normal life mo without your current gf..
why im saying this? because sya na ang nakasama mo as of this moment for so long. Syempre naka implant na sya sa sistema mo.
kaya mo ba mabuhay as "new" kasama ng crush mo ngayon...?
just sit down and relax... ano ba talaga ang tunay mong nararamdaman sa crush mo ngayon versus sa nararamdaman mo sa current gf mo...
if all signs are pointing into one direction that you are not happy with your current gf then go ahead..
pursue your happiness even if it takes someone's heart..
sabi nga...
There is no easy way to break, somebody's heart....
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ayos sa advises.. I read them all... What made me replied here is that ginawa sa akin yan, reverse mode, akala ko akin lang pero may kasabay na pala ako, in short, pinagsabay kami... At secret pa hahahaha... Hmmm... When i was in my college days, my hands are full with women, busy ako sa kanilang tatlo... I was so selfish during that time that i only think of what is best for me, more women,more fancy, more self satisfaction... Nope, i wasn't caught flat footed... But what i do know and experienced that time is that i was guilty.. Guilty of playing with their hearts and its not good... Kaya naman karma beckons... But i took them in stride, ive learned from it and dealt with it... Experience really thought me everything... You can play with them simultaneously but lo and behold of the consequences.. When you enter something you should know where the exit points located... I've been there and i have passed with flying colors but i do not recommend that you follow my footsteps, we have different lives and different destiny... it was a curse i have to live with...
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Here is for you sir arkmeje:
You might need a turning point upon this decision. Kung sino pipiliin nasa iyong kamay yun. The happiness of your future is in your hands. Idefine mo kasi, sa girl na hindi mo nakuha I think you're really inlove with her habang sa gf mo, in my opinion, parang awa nalang nararamdaman mo kasi you know and how I understand the final part of the story, your girlfriend treated you well! And you will feel the guilt of leaving her upon the fact na she was really nice to you...
The choice is yours, happiness with the new girl or contentment with your long relationship you had. Ang gusto ko lang sana kung iiwanan mo si gf, give her dignity and respect. Wag mong awayin, tell her the real reason na nawala na ang feelings mo for her, express to her your appreciation na she had been good to you. Hindi yung iiwanan mo nalang basta or gagamit ka ng gasgas na mga break up lines.
You are a good person, considering na you treat each girl as a critical choice. Pumipili ka at hindi mo pinagsasabay at pupurihin kita doon. And the fact na confused ka sa girl you are a careful lover. Hindi yung tamang L, lang papatol na.
Who ever you chose sa dalawa magkakaroon at magkakaroon ng problema, just have the responsibility to support your decision.
Goodluck!
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“Wag mong isiping hindi ka na niya mahal kase hindi na nga talaga.”